Many people often ask me what I am best at or what my specialty is in. My knowledge and experience has a wide breadth. However, what I am most gifted in is something I deeply deny because of the pain and struggle associated with it.
I am most gifted in shadow work. I am renowned for showing people their shadow sides. I work really hard to keep this gift contained in a nice little package, but often my presence alone is triggering for those that deeply deny their shadow aspects. As many people with deeply rooted gifts say, it is both a blessing and a curse. This definitely rings true for me.
I am very comfortable with my shadow, to an extent. It still brings me pain and struggle, but I see it coming and have come to terms with it in many ways. I have done a lot of work over the years unpacking the ugliest parts of myself so that when someone tries to use it to hurt me I am not blind sided. Usually I’m hurt because I am hurt daily by the state humanity is in, but no one is giving me new information about me. I welcome that, at least. I know myself intimately, all aspects of who I am, the good, the bad, the ugly.
We are entering a season where this is thematic. I suggest that you take the time to this work on the front end to help ease any tension entering into it. I know I will be deepening my self study. There can be no light without darkness and no darkness without light. If you deny this truth within yourself and refuse to integrate, you leave yourself unbalanced and in a constant state of duality. It is easier to own it, honor it, and learn to love it.